You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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