You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
