Where are you?
In a non slutty way
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize