Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
