Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
