you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
The power of my boobs compel you
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize
