your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize