OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Randomize
