Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
