I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
