On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Randomize
