Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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