I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
