I think I died a long time ago.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Randomize
