...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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