Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
