Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
