i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
