we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
