her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
