no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
