Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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