East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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