Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
