So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
do herpes really smell.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Just invented taco cereal.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
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