420 ftw
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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