We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
