i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
