My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
