At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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