what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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