sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
