Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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