windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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