They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Randomize
