peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Randomize
