she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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