I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
