I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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