Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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