I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
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