We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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