Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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