He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
