Are we in a gay sports bar?
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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