Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Randomize