The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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