I'd wear matching sweaters with you
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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