If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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