And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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