Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Ambien. No doubt about it.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Randomize